Stand Out by going back to the Basics!

Oh, how we get caught in our daily thoughts, busy schedules, trying to multitask and satisfy different people at once. Hopefully, not forgetting about our own needs as well!

I really prefer not to stay away from My Blog for so long. It was inevitable, though. Let me explain.

Vacation time came around, and as part of a well-balanced life, we all need a break. The wonderful event of two friends getting married abroad a cruise ship leaving to the Bahamas was just the right vacation we much needed. We enjoyed every moment of this adventure and thank our friends for an amazing time! Following, continuous preparations for the upcoming Orlando Citrus Club Member Business Expo in September have taken quite a bit of time and creative thinking energy out of our daily routine. Nothing to complain, though. The second semester has started out with very good spirits and ideas, and I immediately saw myself strongly involved in aiding another company I love in developing their new brochure and stationary items. (Please note, I am not a graphic designer on top of all! I help with the wording and strategic placement of such).
New clients, networking events and meetings have come along and the semester has a very exciting outlook!

I will briefly write a note on online Social Networks and other online Social Programs available to us. There are plenty, however, the ones I use are Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter and although I have an account with Orkut, I might soon delete it.
Do you feel online social networks are taking over our social lives, at some level? I absolutely think YES. To many, it feels like if you are not part of it, you are missing out!

In my opinion, social networks are here to stay and are here to grow day after day. We lose the personal touch of chatting with a friend in person or over the phone. We lose the motivation of writing a real Thank You card on paper or sending out real paper invitations, handwritten, because all can be done online for no cost and so much faster. It's instant! The online social world is powerful.

It's fast, it's real and it's quite efficient.

You plan a party: You create an event on Facebook, and invite your friends to the event. They will know through Facebook that your party is on this day, at that time, and what the theme is. Fast, simple, no real cost associated with it.
You update a friend: You have big news and it's 01:40a.m. Your friend lives across the world, 5h ahead of you, so, you send her a message or a wall post to ensure she receives the big news early in the morning. You don't want to call and wake her up, do you?
Your company is in the news: You Tweet about it on Twitter, letting all of your followers know about the great reviews on your business.

Easy. Fast. Efficient.

BUT (there is always a "but", isn't there?)...

These are the times when you NEED to STAND OUT.

In this era, you WILL stand out by going back to the basics.

YOU WILL STAND OUT BY:

• Calling your friend early in the morning and personally/over the phone, give her your amazing news.
• Writing out real-deal invitations to your party and mailing them to your friends and family.
• Sending a copy of your company article/review to your favorite clients, friends and family, BY MAIL with a handwritten note!
• Writing a post-card to clients, friends and family directly from your vacation spot.
• Sending your friend an update on what's going on in your life in form of a handwritten letter, with pictures you printed out and a fun magazine article you think he/she might enjoy reading.

The Internet world is FAST and EFFICIENT, however, if you want to let people know HOW MUCH you care for the relationship you have with them, invest the TIME and seriously commit to it. I love online social networks, and I am certainly not advocating for people to leave them. I am very active in all I am part of, and dedicate time to it. I enjoy it and see how useful they can be.
But keep in mind as well:

Going back to the basics, right now, will REALLY make you stand out from the crowd.

Brushing up on Gift Giving Etiquette!

July - What an eventful and quite busy Summer month!

Let's talk about Gift Giving and Receiving!

Most people will say openly that giving evokes far better and more fulfilling feelings than receiving. For most, I believe this can actually be true. On the other hand, let's all be very honest with ourselves and admit that receiving gifts is also very, very nice! It makes us feel special, and most of us think so!

To be remembered by someone for a special occasion in our life is unforgettable. No matter the size of the gift, whether it's a handwritten card, flowers, a very expensive electronic device or delicious chocolates. Whether it's your favorite perfume, the last season of your favorite TV Drama or an inspirational book, when we receive and give a gift, 4 things are happening:

1. The person giving the gift to you is communicating to you how important you are to her/him.
2. The person giving the gift to you is silently saying "I invested time (and money) to get you something that I believe will bring you value and make you happy."
3. The person giving the gift to you is anxiously awaiting your reaction to the gift.
4. The receiver of the gift is accepting this material thing that is celebrating a friendship, an accomplishment or another important event and is agreeing that this exchange represents the caring coming from the gift giver.
5. The person receiving the gift feels special and cared for that the gift giver took time (and money) to spend it on you.
6. The receiver of the gift expresses a true or untrue opinion about the gift "Wow, I love it! Thanks!"

I strongly believe gifts can have the power of positively or negatively influencing a relationship.

The GIFT GIVER's Duties:

When choosing a gift, remember how the person dresses, what his/her daily life is like, where they work, and what people they are usually surrounded with or places they travelled to.

Choose a gift by recalling what the person likes to talk about. Is he a golfer or Sports fanatic? Is she into Politics and writing? Maybe he is a Musician and appreciates music from other countries. This is why it is also so important to LISTEN to people well when they tell you stories and share opinions. You learn a lot about their likes and dislikes.

Never, and I will repeat it again (I already even mentioned that in a previous post), ask the gift receiver "Do you like it? Oh, I think you don't like it...You can exchange it if you want to!.." You should NEVER have to ask and say that. You should offer to exchange the gift yourself if you bought the gift receiver a t-shirt, for example, that is a wrong size. Apologize and offer to exchange it yourself!

Avoid giving a gift card, unless the gift receiver has actually expressed his/her liking of gift cards. Gift cards may be interpreted as "Here is something for you. I didn't really have time to look for something for you, but with this card you can buy whatever you want." So, basically, you didn't give a gift. You paid for something the gift receiver chose.

The GIFT RECEIVER's Duties:

Immediately THANK the gift giver for the gift, WHETHER OR NOT you truly like it! I am sorry to say, but it would be the rudest thing to say "Oh, what the heck is that? I'm sorry, I don't even know what to do with this!!.." No comments.

Write a Thank You card (yes!) to the Gift Giver thanking him/her for the gift. You may want to write something like: "Dear Cathy, thank you so much for thinking about me on my special day! I love the new "Cool Blues" CD you gave me. I take it in my car with me, and my ride to work is much more enjoyable! Thank you! Cordially, your Cousin Laurie". Write a Thank You card when the gift giver is present giving you the gift and also when the gift giver is not present when you receive the gift.

Nowadays, with e-mail and text-messaging, personal phone calls are becoming rare, unfortunately. People claim not to have time. Personal phone calls are becoming special! So, give your gift giver a call to thank them for the gift in case you will be going out of town and will have not time for Thank You cards. I will insist that Thank You cards are the preferred option, and avoid e-mails or (even worse) text messaging. But, yes, I know we've all been in a situation where we find it too convenient not to e-mail or text messaging. Just keep in mind: Thank You cards are the best option. Avoid the rest. Be a class act!

Please, never re-gift the gift you received. In my opinion, this is a big No-No. Some people will tell you it is OK to do if you are very careful, but don't you feel bad abut it? I would! You can find good use for a gift that is, let's say, not really of your taste 100%. Just be creative!

Keep track of who gave you which gift, and if you are hosting a large event where many gifts are presented, designate a family member or good friend who is willing to help you create a list. It will come in VERY handy when you write your Thank You cards!

A month or two have passed since you received all your beautiful gifts and you STILL did not find any time to write your Thank You cards? Do it now! In my honest opinion, it is NOT too late. Again, be creative. Surprise the gift giver and write something like "Dear Eric, You will not believe how much I enjoyed using the backpack you gave me for my Birthday, on my camping trip this weekend! It is so useful, and it didn't leave my side. Thank you for this thoughtful gift that made all the difference and that I will put to great use in all my upcoming camping trips! Yours, Louise."

VERY IMPORTANT:

Note that some people prefer not to receive gifts. Or, to explain it better, gift giving and receiving may not truly be part of their culture. You should respect this, and not expect the person to jump up and down when you offer them your gift. In this case, keep it very simple. The last thing you want is to overwhelm the gift receiver. You may want to invite the person out to drinks or to lunch and dinner, instead of giving them a gift. You may want to call them on their Birthday or Graduation day, or other event and sincerely congratulate them, expressing kindness and happiness. Another great idea is to donate money to a charity this person strongly supports! This might be all they want. KNOW your gift receiver. This is key to a successful interpersonal exchange!

Ok, but don't forget to recognize what's GOOD as well!

So far, according to the poll, it seems most people voice their bad service experience directly to management, and/or write a nasty letter (can I assume it would be a nasty letter?) to the owners or corporate office.

Most of us are not looking for monetary compensation, like getting our money back or receiving a free meal on the next visit, but so many times we get something out of it anyways without even asking for it. Our intent, often, is just for someone to listen to what we have to say and rectify the situation, hopefully not letting it happen again!

My husband and I received full compensation for our whole, entire meal (from Appetizer to Dessert and coffee) many, many years ago at McCormick & Schmick's. We received a free sushi roll from our neighborhood Chinese/Japanese Restaurant while ordering for home delivery after our last home delivery had arrived with fewer items than what we had ordered. We also received a "15% off on every visit" from a Barbecue Restaurant, however, have ever since experienced continuous unsatisfactory service that we now simply don't go there anymore that often (even though we have the discount card!).

Now, you might think "these guys eat out a lot, my goodness!" or "they must be heavy complainers!". A little bit of both is true. But our focus is actually on something else:

My husband and I always, and I repeat, always point out good service to our server and to management. We make it a point to express how excellent service was and why it was so good. Both of us, having worked in the hospitality industry, know how important it is for employees and management to recognize top service and success. We believe in how powerful this is.

We believe that while complaining about what's wrong will (hopefully) trigger some changes for the best, pointing out what's RIGHT has an amazing impact on employee morale and on how WE feel. Our contribution of verbally expressing our gratitude for good service goes a long way.

How about shifting our thoughts now to observing and recognizing good service? Maybe we can also turn the nasty letters into amazing compliment letters. To receive a verbal or written compliment from a guest/client, is one of the strongest motivators one can experience at work, positively affecting one's attitude towards people and one's job.

I will write more and more about service, service etiquette and handling service issues, however, this post was intended to remind us all that it IS important to recognize good service. It IS important to let servers and managers know how great service was. Believe wen I say that it DOES make a difference!

InternEtiquette - Part I

A few topics deserve more posts. Like the "Iffy Situations" series that I started, I will dedicate a few posts to, ...let's call it InternEtiquette!

This is a topic hard to tackle due to its complexity. It involves so many aspects, applications, "places", things, words, information, web sites, logos, e-mails, social media, pictures, viruses, privacy, copyright issues,...Uff! But please, note, I am not a lawyer...I will focus on the politeness that is so often forgotten in the online world. My suggestions and advice come entirely from my experience in the Etiquette Business.

My first on the list: E-MAILS!

What I have been noticing:

• People who don't greet others when e-mailing: By leaving out a "Hello, John! How are you today?" you send the message that the content is more important than your manners and respect for others. How do you speak to others on the phone? You greet them first, correct?
• People who don't finish their e-mails with an appropriate closing note: By not saying "Goodbye!", "Have a nice day, and I'll talk to you later!" or "Thank you for your e-mail" you are definitely not considering good manners and god communication. It is like hanging up on somebody via e-mail!
• People who misspell (and not by accident) and use wrong grammar: No excuses here. I only tolerate it when people are using English as their second or third language. If English is your first language, you should never, and I repeat, never, use wrong grammar and spell words incorrectly. It shows lack of care, lack of attention and lack of respect for yourself and others.
• People forwarding your e-mails and e-mail addresses to others without your "permission": Here is a tricky one. I would never wrongly judge my mother for forwarding my e-mails with pictures of my daughter and us to her cousins and best friends! I know she does it out of love. Being far away, e-mail has become one of our main modes of communication. I appreciate my mom and friends caring!However, apparently my personal e-mail address was given out to a lady constantly sending out messages about events that, unfortunately, don't interest me. I don't know her well, but know a few people who know her. You get the idea.
• People not answering your e-mails: Once I wrote about the time management excuse of "I don't have time". Thus, if you don't answer e-mails promptly (urgent ones on the same day and non-urgent ones within 48h, Internet access being available, of course), you are sending out the message that you don't have time for that person's issues, comments, questions etc. You are mostly, however, sending out the message that you have time (of course, we all have time!), but you choose to do with it something else than answering your friend, client, family member. If you have an e-mail account, expect people to e-mail you. Check it daily. Make it a habit! It has become one of the most common and convenient communication modes. If you have one, use it, or people will lose interest in e-mailing you!

These are some of the basic faux-pas of e-mailing that I consider mentioning. I have not gone into content yet. Next time, let's talk about e-mail content and social media! It is amazing, how social media has become part of our lives as people and business people. For now, have a good one, everybody, and I look forward to your comments and questions!

Definitely talk the talk, walk the walk, do as you preach!

Unfortunately, I must say, it has happened quite often that I personally sent an e-mail to someone in the business world, without ever receiving an answer back. Many of them have been compliments and questions, and none of them have been about pitching services. Ever. The most ironic thing is that the majority of my e-mail recipients have clearly stated "E-mail me anytime! I'm here to answer your questions! Or call me!". None of them were celebrities.

Maybe I should have called, because e-mail didn't work.
Some of the people I am referring to are in a business similar to mine. You would think that at least these people apparently practicing good manners would understand the value of contacting someone back when they receive mail.

Hm.

Sometimes we can't contact someone back as soon as we wished, but to let weeks and even months go by is just a shame. Professionals should know better. There is a sense of urgency that is lost, but that can be recovered.

How can you ensure you don't end up in a person's short-term memory, "leave it for later" folder, mails, calls and ultimately "forgot who you were" junk box?

• Persistence
• Social grace
• Content quality
• Added value
• Understanding

Follow up with an e-mail or call if you don't hear from the person after 48h. If you still don't hear anything and you really need to reach the person, you may want to try calling instead of e-mailing. Don't give up, but never push.
Always be friendly, polite, smile when you speak and write, and mind your word choice.
Be straight to the point. If the person is known to be busy, be short and efficient in your communication style. Remember, people like to be associated to those they feel they have something in common with. Your content has to be appealing and self-explanatory as to why you are contacting them.
Offer value to them. I will talk about VALUE in my next post. (think about what it means to you in the meantime).
Understand circumstances change daily, hourly. Understand how you are approaching them, and re-evaluate it. Understand some people, unfortunately, are not good communicators.

I'm sorry for the delay!

We all know the holiday season is a very busy time of the year. Can you believe it already passed and we are in 2009? Sometimes, we feel we are so involved with all the parties, office parties, cooking, baking, wrapping gifts, decorating, opening gifts, entertaining, taking pictures and reading holiday cards, that days go by and the holiday entertainment and atmosphere do not seem to cease!

Then, we realize the difficult thruth: We forgot to THANK people for their caring gift they gave us and our family in the month of December. Well, you know you thanked them verbally, but you really wanted to send out a nice Thank You Note expressing your gratitude.

Now, you find yourself already in January! What should you do?

The best thing to do is to be creative!

• Make a very small compilation of your favorite Holiday pictures on which your kids, your loved one, your pets or the beautiful natural scenery is displayed.
• Use these pictures to create a fun Thank You card where you not only thank the person for their gift(s), but where you also wish them all the best for the new year!
• You may use colorful paper to crate your cards or a fun computer software can help you as well. Even a simple word processing program can create nice cards!
• You may want to add a small note on your card simply apologizing for the delay

There is a "social rule" that asks for Thank Yous to be given no later than 48h. You can call or send a card. I understand we sometimes have the best of intentions, but are unable to stay withing these 48h. While this short time span demonstrates a strong commitment from your part, don't feel bad if you are unable to stay within it.

Think about how you can learn from this experience as well. How did it make you feel when you wanted to send out the Thank You cards but didn't do so "in time? Then, how did it make you feel to end out personalized cards with holiday pictures and a handwritten note?

Think about using your weekly/daily goal strategy to your advantage before the holiday season comes again. Choose a day around those December days that you will dedicate to writing your cards. To increase your efficiency, you may even want to think about pre-addressing the envelopes sometime during a quiet day of the year, or choosing which card will go to what family/friend, and save time by doing so!

E is for Thank You Etiquette.

E is for Efficiency.